duck, duck, duck... chicken?

Psalm 34:5 (HCSV)
Those who look to Him are radiant with joy;
their faces will never be ashamed.

Psalm 43:5 (HCSV)
Why am I so depressed?
Why this turmoil within me?
Put your hope in God, for I will still praise Him,
my savior and my God.

The first verse always feels like a sucker punch. Not just any kind of punch though, the kind that you see coming and possibly even deserve... I've read these verses before, but this was the first time i've read them back to back like today. I don't feel like I have the Joy of the Lord like I aim to have. I guess it kinda goes along the lines of "there is not right or wrong amount of time you should spend time in prayer... if you feel like you aren't praying enough, pray more." I know there is not right or wrong level of Joy we should have in life. But the second I try to say I'm content, I realize I just got more excited over a Starbucks Frappaccino, than I do reading my bible. That's where the second verse comes into play. Why am I like that? Am I really struggling this much to have Joy? Or is Satan working to tear me down? OR is God working in me and I just don't see where all this growth is leading me yet? OI, once again... I think I need prayers. I want to be like Psalm 66:16-20. I love you all, and if you're reading this... thank you. I really mean it.

16 Come and listen, all who fear God,
and I will tell what He has done for me.

17 I cried out to Him with my mouth,
and praise was on my tongue.

18 If I had been aware of malice in my heart,
the Lord would not have listened.

19 However, God has listened;
He has paid attention to the sound of my prayer.

20 May God be praised!
He has not turned away my prayer
or turned His faithful love from me.